MASKED FEELINGS

I get a great deal of information for clients psychically, but most of my own personal messages come to me in dreams.

My dreams have always been very vivid, sometimes epic sagas.  I try to record them as soon as I begin to wake up as recall is best at that moment.

Face Mask

Last night my mother (who has been deceased for nine years) showed up in my dream.  It was her birthday.  She asked me how I was doing, and I replied as I always did, “I’m fine.”  She stepped away from me and speaking to my father (who has been deceased 35 years) and said, “this is the one child I’ve always worried about.  I can never tell how she really feels.  She says she’s fine but I’m not always sure that’s what’s really going on.”

As she walked away, I pondered.  Was she right?  Yes.

For her birthday, my gift to her was to express my true feelings.  This was a BIG deal!  I wrote to my mom, telling her that she was right; I didn’t let others know how I really felt.  I told her that my need to protect myself started very young, when I didn’t feel safe enough to divulge how I really felt.  My angry and abusive dad made it impossible to open up.  Her mental illness was like deaf ears.

I have consciously worked on being open and honest about my feelings and encourage others to do the same.  I have been more open than ever in personal relationships, especially within the last 10 years, with an emphasis on non-judgment while I remain honest about how I feel.  Even so, sometimes, when I am asked point-blank about how I feel, I have to really dig deep and search for those emotions.  And, sometimes, the feeling still evade my reach, at least at first.

This is real growth and I know it.  I have to remind myself often, however, that this is good – very good.  What happens is that the people we work the hardest to stay in balance with sometimes shy away when we actually find our emotional equilibrium.  That’s because, to them, the rules have changed and they don’t know how to relate to us any longer.  Unless…unless they, too have opted to challenge themselves to personal growth. That’s best case scenario, but, it doesn’t always work out that way.  Further growth happens when we accept that fact and let it be.

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Connie Stewart, Intuitive Profiler, Medium
Energetic Space Clearing (Corporate and Private)
Cutting Energetic Cords to the Past 
619-573-5927